What motivates you in life? Living a life you love starts with the initial inspiration, it is what sets the tone for your choices. Are you chasing freedom? Running from fear? Craving power? Seeking joy?
The key to getting what you want in life is to believe that you deserve it. Believe that the promotion, lover, body, opportunity that you want is already yours. To be so immersed in the feelings of appreciation and joy in having an amazing life that the universe has no choice but to be part of making it happen. Often we focus on the thing/weight/position we want to obtain but that is not really what we are after. What we are really seeking are the feelings and narrative that have been created around it. It is not that being a magic weight, it's the idea that when I reach my goal weight I will feel more confident, have more choices in mates, clothing options, and be happier. When I have X amount in my bank account I will feel less stressed and have the freedom to travel. The kicker is that both of these ideas are absolutely correct, the key is focusing on the emotions, not the object. Feeling more confident will impact how I view the world and what opportunities I take.
If you want to have a healthier bank account read up on investing, listen to podcasts on wealth management, start feeding yourself the information you need to grow your net worth. Take stock of what you are feeding yourself through media, personal interactions, information sources and make sure it aligns with your goals. If you want to move to Costa Rica and become a poet then start following poets and expats on instagram! Post your work. listen to a podcast on relocating. Follow me! Whether it's a healthy and fit body, romance or kick ass job, get excited about your life. The catch? You cannot fake it. The universe knows, your gut knows, when you are authentic.
Which brings us to self love. I'm not talking treat-yourself-to-a-pedi self love, I mean honest, embrace your dark side, forgive your flaws and know your worth, self love. When we look at the world with our crowns high the possibilities are limitless. Hopefully there is a part of you that is rejoicing and ready to move forward, maybe you are a little closer to "ok, I hear you buuuut I am not really sure what that looks like." Maybe there is a part of you that has already decided that this sounds impossible. Wherever you are, start there. To loving yourself is to care less about your story, your patterns, and care more about who you want to become. Take an honest and thorough inventory of what you are working with vs what you want, the work to be done is the space between the two.
Identify your dream then add traction. What do you want? It is a simple question but undoubtably one of the most difficult to answer. Instead of stressing out over this question let yourself daydream. What ideas come up? What were your favorite childhood activities? Grab a journal and start listing your favorite things. A pattern will emerge. Need inspiration? There are several amazing podcasts and TedTalks about identifying your motivation. Simon Sinek has become a household name due to the simple genius of his presentation on finding your why.
Now for the traction, the doing. What are things you can start doing to move this dream forward? Yes, the smallest steps still count. Speak the ideas out loud. Keep daydreaming about the details (research). Attend lectures. Read books. Talk to professionals. Evaluate the reality of the fears that are gnashing at your heart. The important thing is to do something, get the momentum going. This makes it real, and a little scary, keep going anyway. Life is not about finding yourself-life is about creating yourself.
Find your tribe. It has been said countless different ways but the wisdom is there: you are the company you keep. If the people you surround yourself with are trying new restaurants and seeking out fun events the chances of you being exposed to new ideas and being open to epic experiences is much greater. Take inventory of the conversations you are having right now. Are you talking about the latest reality show or the insight you picked up from the podcast you binged on last night? Do you have people in your life who can talk about stock options, recommend a book or share knowledge about gardening? If not it is time to start branching out and exploring ways to find people who are doing their own work and living fully (or in the process of discovery). Follow your passions and you will find them. Your tribe will encourage you to to be your best self regardless of how it serves them. Your tribe will lovingly call you on your shit. Does your community reflect where you want to be? What are you doing to attract them?
Nourish your whole self. The reality is you have this one amazing body and it responds to what you think, feel, and say just as much as it does to how you move and what you feed it. The health of your physical body, emotional self and spirituality are interconnected. If you neglect one area the whole self suffers and will try to overcompensate without success. If you are over saturating your senses with junk and disconnecting from your authentic hunger you become complacent in your own failure. Fill your senses with what you desire, drink more water, eat good food, meditate, speak Kindly, go to therapy and work out those negative thought patterns.
Sweat. Our bodies are meant to move. Our wild side begs us to dance, stretch, make love and push our limits. Moving our bodies helps us to regulate our hormones, releases dopamine and increases our pleasure in life. Moving our bodies helps us to see the world through a different lens and changes our problem solving capabilities. I always find that I am most alive and engaged in the present when I am in that sweet spot of exertion: when I am pushing my limits but more focused on the outcome than the difficulty. Invite in the joy you desire, create space for inspiration and it will show up.
Create. Art is everything. It is a reflection of our souls. Art is science. Art is fundamental to who we are as a species. So much of our belief systems are impacted by the way we process our past and present realities. The deep processing needed to really let go of our trauma is not connected to our language centers it is connected to a primal part of our brain that speaks in colors, images, sounds and movement. Our expression, our healing, is limited when do not take advantage of our bodies need to express itself. Action as an expression of your thoughts and feelings, allows for clearing the space of turmoil and creating room for joy.
Challenge yourself to really look at your life and see where you are living small and avoiding conflict. Challenge yourself to see where you are feeding the demons and perpetuating the cycle of unhappiness. Put down your armor and open yourself the the amazing life you deserve.